Can a Man Have More Than One Wife?

//Can a Man Have More Than One Wife?
Can a Man Have More Than One Wife? 2018-02-26T11:37:52+00:00

In these last days that we are living in, it is interesting to note how certain “strange” things suddenly start crawling out of the woodwork. Just as I wrote in another article about Christians who don’t want to believe that they will be going straight to heaven or hell when they die, but only into a state of sleep until Jesus’ return. From the Bible we have seen that that point of view is not Scriptural at all.

Suddenly I am being confronted – on more than one occasion – by Christian men who want to allege that they don’t just have to stay with one wife, because: “Solomon had many wives…” etc. And this argument they then want to use as Biblical “proof” why they may stay in other adulterous affairs, or why they don’t have to stay loyal to one wife. Not that they necessarily want to divorce, just as long as they “…can have other women too”.

Or they want to use arguments like: “Even nature shows you that one male can have a harem of multiple females. Just look at an impala ram with all his ewes, or a male lion with all his females, or a baboon male with all his females…”  Regarding the argument concerning nature, I just want to show you that God created man as the CROWN of His creation, in His own likeness and that we can’t compare ourselves with the animal kingdom.

Again we can only go back to the basics of the Bible and read it just as it is written:

“For we write NONE OTHER THINGS unto you, than what ye read or acknowledge; and I trust ye shall acknowledge even to the end…”

(2 Corinthians 1:13)

This means we can read the Bible as it is written and understand what is written, just as it is written. Jesus also warned us very clearly in Matthew 22:29:

“Jesus answered and said unto them, Ye do err, not knowing the scriptures, nor the power of God.”

Let us see then who “errs” because of “not knowing the scriptures”… those Christian men who just want to justify their sexual lusts from the Bible… or the Christian men who want to stand for the truth of the Bible, just as it is written…

In the first instance we read in Genesis 1:27:

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; MALE AND FEMALE created he them.”

Please note that the Bible says “…male and female…”  it does NOT say “…male and females…”. So, when God created man after His own likeness, He created them as ONE MALE and ONE FEMALE.

We also read in Genesis:

“And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took ONE of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;  And the RIB, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he A WOMAN, and brought HER unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: SHE shall be called WOMAN, because SHE was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” (Genesis 2:20-24)

Please take note of a few very clear ideas from these verses:

1. God takes ONE of Adam’s ribs, not TWO or THREE or FOUR.

2. Then God took the ONE rib and made “…’a woman…”, not “…women…”.

3. Adam calls out: “…SHE shall be called woman…”, he doesn’t say “…THEY will be called women…”.

4. And lastly Adam says: “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his WIFE…”, he doesn’t say that he will cleave unto his WIVES.

Thus we see in Genesis that God created Adam and EVE, not Adam and en EVE’s. The interesting thing to take note of, is that this verse regarding a man leaving his parents and cleaving unto his WIFE, is referred to a further three times in the Bible. In other words, this verse is contained in the Bible FOUR times. If something is contained in the Bible four times, I think God is quite serious about that specific matter. Read with me:

“And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them MALE AND FEMALE, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his WIFE: and they TWAIN (two) shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain (two), but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” (Matthew 19:4-6)

“And the Pharisees came to him, and asked him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife? tempting him. And he answered and said unto them, What did Moses command you? And they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away. And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. But from the beginning of the creation God made them MALE AND FEMALE. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his WIFE; And they twain (two) shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain (two), but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” (Mark 10:2-9)

“For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his WIFE, and they TWO shall be one flesh.”  (Ephesians 5:30,31)

In Matthew and Mark we see that Jesus Christ is the one speaking. And who is Jesus Christ? He is God Himself! And what does Jesus do? He refers to the creation in Genesis and He confirms that from the beginning God created them MALE AND FEMALE and that the TWO of them will be one flesh. He doesn’t say that the three, four or five of them will be one flesh. In his letter to the Ephesians, Paul, inspired by the Holy Spirit, writes exactly the same thing! The man will be joined unto his WIFE and the TWO of them will be one flesh.

But where did man become disobedient to God’s instructions regarding one man and one wife? Let’s stay in Genesis, because we shouldn’t forget the words of 2 Timothy 3:16,17:

ALL SCRIPTURE is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works.”

Clearly then I can learn from ALL SCRIPTURE, which is “…given by inspiration of God…”, and I can also be CORRECTED from it. So, I can’t just write Genesis off as just so much history, or that it may not be applicable to us anymore, no, I can still learn doctrine from it, because Genesis was ALSO given by inspiration of God (no matter what other people may say).

“And Cain went out from the presence of the LORD, and dwelt in the land of Nod, on the east of Eden. And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived, and bare Enoch: and he builded a city, and called the name of the city, after the name of his son, Enoch. And unto Enoch was born Irad: and Irad begat Mehujael: and Mehujael begat Methusael: and Methusael begat Lamech. And Lamech took unto him TWO wives: the name of the one was Adah, and the name of the other Zillah.” (Genesis 4:16-19)

Here we see that the first person who took unto himself TWO wives, was Lamech, from the bloodline of Cain. So very clearly Cain’s disobedience to God cropped up a few generations later in Lamech’s life, who suddenly takes unto himself two wives. But did you notice that Cain “…knew his WIFE…”? Even he didn’t have more than one wife.

But as we read from the Bible from the time of Lamech more and more people, including God’s own children began looking at other people, and what other people did, instead of staying obedient to God’s instructions. Another person who intentionally and in total disobedience took unto himself more than one wife, was Esau. We read:

“When Esau saw that Isaac had blessed Jacob, and sent him away to Padanaram, to take him a wife from thence; and that as he blessed him he gave him a charge, saying, Thou shalt not take a wife of the daughters of Canaan; And that Jacob obeyed his father and his mother, and was gone to Padanaram; And Esau seeing that the daughters of Canaan pleased not Isaac his father; Then went Esau unto Ishmael, and took unto the wives which he had Mahalath the daughter of Ishmael Abraham’s son, the sister of Nebajoth, to be his wife.” (Genesis 28:6-9)

It is clear that Esau tried to “spite” his parents and therefore took unto himself more than one wife, and specifically from the tribes that did not please his father. To this day it breaks my heart to see how certain Christian men intentionally try to “spite” their own friends and family by having multiple adulterous affairs in direct disobedience to God’s Word. But remember the saying: “Cut your nose to spite your own face”. At the end of the day it is just that person himself who looses a lot, because his disobedience to the Word of God opens the door to a number of attacks from satan on his wife, his finances, his relationship with his family, with his children, etc..

But still they want to stick to the argument that all those men had more than one wife and that Solomon even had seven hundred wives, so why can’t they have multiple wives too? Okay, so let’s read in the Bible what all those wives eventually caused in Solomon’s life.

“But king Solomon loved many strange women… Of the nations concerning which the LORD said unto the children of Israel, Ye shall not go in to them, neither shall they come in unto you: for surely they will turn away your heart after their gods: Solomon clave unto these in love. And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines: and his wives turned away his heart. For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the LORD his God, as was the heart of David his father… And Solomon did evil in the sight of the LORD, and went not fully after the LORD, as did David his father…. And the LORD was angry with Solomon, because his heart was turned from the LORD God of Israel, which had appeared unto him twice, And had commanded him concerning this thing, that he should not go after other gods: but he kept not that which the LORD commanded. Wherefore the LORD said unto Solomon, Forasmuch as this is done of thee, and thou hast not kept my covenant and my statutes, which I have commanded thee, I will surely rend the kingdom from thee, and will give it to thy servant.” (1 Kings 11:1-11)

Can you see what was the result of Solomon’s disobedience to the Lord’s instructions? His many wives turned away his heart from the Lord and he went not fully after the Lord. This is exactly what happens to men who want to have more than one wife. Those adulterous relationships results in the hearts of men of God who previously served the Lord fully not serving Him in the same manner as before and that they don’t live in total obedience to God’s Word any longer. In effect their hearts are also “turned away” by the “idol/god” called lust, because many men get addicted thereto, just as to smoking or drinking or drugs…. We also see that the result of Solomon’s disobedience is that the Lord takes away his kingship. I see this to be in line with the very well-known words of Hosea 4:6:

My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge: because thou hast rejected knowledge, I will also reject thee, that thou shalt be no priest to me: seeing thou hast forgotten the law of thy God, I will also forget thy children.”

Those men who are part of God’s children, and who want to use the Bible to justify their disobedience, thus keeping on sinning intentionally, must beware that the Lord doesn’t take away their “kingship” and “priesthood” as well. Who are God’s “kings and priests” today? Let’s read together.

“And from Jesus Christ, who is the faithful witness, and the first begotten of the dead, and the prince of the kings of the earth. Unto him that loved us, and washed us from our sins in his own blood,  And hath made US KINGS AND PRIESTS unto God and his Father; to him be glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen.” (Revelation 1:5,6)

For if we SIN WILFULLY after that we have received the knowledge of the truth, there remaineth no more sacrifice for sins, But a certain fearful looking for of judgment and fiery indignation, which shall devour the adversaries.” (Hebrews 10:26,27)

Be warned!

No what must such a person rather do? He must confess his sins and STOP doing it!

“If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we CONFESS our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:8,9)

“He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso CONFESSETH AND FORSAKETH them shall have mercy.(Proverbs 28:13)

Why am I so serious about this, or how can I say that this is sin? For I see in the Bible that extra-marital sex is fornication and therefore, according to God, sin. And just read in what clear language the Bible speaks about fornication:

Now the body is NOT FOR FORNICATION, but for the Lord; and the Lord for the body…. Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh. But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit. FLEE FORNICATION. Every SIN that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication SINNETH against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.” (1 Corinthians 6:13-20)

“But who says sex outside of marriage with somebody else’s wife, is outside of God’s will and is sin?”  some people ask me. Well…. the Bible….

“And it came to pass after these things, that his master’s wife cast her eyes upon Joseph; and she said, Lie with me. But he refused, and said unto his master’s wife, Behold, my master wotteth not what is with me in the house, and he hath committed all that he hath to my hand; There is none greater in this house than I; neither hath he kept back any thing from me but thee, because thou art his wife: how then can I do this great wickedness, and sin against God?” (Genesis 39:7-9)

Look at this! Joseph receives an open invitation from Potiphar’s wife to have sex with her. Most of today’s men who want to justify their sins, would have accepted that invitation immediately, but Joseph REFUSES. Why? Because Joseph is a TRUE MAN OF GOD! And please note what this man of God says in that last verse: “…how then can I do this great WICKEDNESS and SIN AGAINST GOD?”  From Joseph’s words we receive the Biblical confirmation that, if he would have had sex with Potiphar’s wife – another man’s wife – then he would have SINNED AGAINST GOD! Who still wants to argue that sex outside of marriage is NOT sin?

Do you know what happened to people in the Old Testament who had sex with other married people? Let us now read Deuteronomy 22:22:

“If a man be found lying with a woman married to an husband, then they shall BOTH of them die, both the man that lay with the woman, and the woman: so shalt thou put away evil from Israel.”

“And the man that committeth adultery with another man’s wife, even he that committeth adultery with his neighbour’s wife, the adulterer AND the adulteress shall surely be put to death.(Leviticus 20:10)

Wow! If somebody committed adultery in the Old Testament and had sex with other men or women, they were stoned to death. And please, don’t even try to use the argument that the women with whom you are having such an adulterous relationship “is not married”. Because the Bible is just as clear about men having sex with unmarried young women. Can you see how big an abomination sex outside of marriage was to God in the Old Testament? My question to today’s Christians is: If sex outside of marriage was such an ABOMINATION to God that He had them stoned to death, what makes Christians think it is acceptable to Him today? Where in the Bible do we see that GOD has changed HIS view regarding this? For I read in the Bible that God hasn’t changed:

“For I am the LORD, I change NOT…” (Malachi 3:6)

“Jesus Christ the SAME yesterday, and to day, and for ever.” (Hebrews 13:8)

This means that if God has never changed, that His view regarding sex outside of marriage is ALSO still the same! Praise Jesus that He doesn’t let us be stoned to death anymore, but did you know that the PRINCIPLE is still the same in the spirit today? What do I mean, you ask? I mean that to this day things “DIE” when there is fornication and sex outside of marriage. Usually one or more than one marriage “dies”, or relationships between a father and his children “die”, or relationships between an mother and her children “die”, or even finances “die” in some instances, etc. During counselling sessions we have had it more than once that a person who was busy with pornography or with adulterous affairs, had serious financial problems, and that his finances were actually “dying”. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t say for one moment that all people who have financial problems are busy with sexual immorality, because there are many other factors that can also contribute thereto, but we do get it in situations like these.

My call to any Christian man in the world, who wants to justify his sin, is to come out of his rebellion and stubbornness, because even that stubbornness is sin according to the Bible.

For REBELLION is as the SIN of witchcraft, and STUBBORNNESS is as iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the LORD, he hath also rejected thee from being king.”    (1 Samuel 15:23)

Here we have a further warning that God may remove your “kingship” if you don’t become obedient to God’s Word and wilfully and stubbornly keep on rejection God’s instructions.

Therefore we see from the Bible that there is no Biblical grounds to justify any multiple relationships. It is just not Scriptural. Stay with the one wife God has given you, pray daily for the Lord’s wisdom to make your marriage work from your side. (You are welcome to order my DVD called: “King, Priest and Prophet” in which I explain the role of the husband in marriage.)

Because men, take heed of just another warning in the Bible, what will happen if you don’t live with your wife according to the Word:

“Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, GIVING HONOUR unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” (1 Peter 3:7)

Sir, does it sometimes feel as if you are “…praying against the ceiling”? Does it sometimes feel as if your prayers are not being answered? Then my question to you is: – do you live with your wife “…according to knowledge…”, in the wisdom God gives you, and do you give honour to your WIFE? Because if not my Bible is clear that your prayers will be “hindered” and thus not heard. Most definitely it is not “…according to knowledge…”  to have multiple adulterous relationships and most definitely you do not honour your wife if you are in adulterous relationships with other women. So, don’t marvel at the reason why your prayers are not heard…

May the Holy Spirit of God convict every true man of God regarding the truth of this message in their own lives.

“And when he (the Holy Spirit) is come, he will reprove (convict) the world of SIN, and of righteousness, and of judgment…” (John 16:8)

Are YOU open to the conviction of the Holy Spirit in your life, you who call yourself a Christian or a man of God? Or are you so blinded by your adulterous affairs with other women in your life, that even the Holy Spirit can’t convict you of your sin?

tiaan gildenhuys

Authority in Christ Ministries

Pretoria RSA

22/10/2011